In interpersonal communication, we must stay away from people with 'emotional black holes'

There is such a saying circulating on the Internet:

"When you reach a certain age, you have to lose four things: meaningless dinners, relatives who look down on you, false friends, and people who don't love you."

I take it for granted.

In every relationship, every relationship, we crave a certain "emotional value" from the other person.

We influence each other, help each other, and give each other comfort and support in our stressful lives.

However, if he is always consuming you when getting along with the other party, and eventually makes you fall into "twisting and internal friction", you should stay away from these people.

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Stay away from "unthankful" people

In "Aesop's Fables", there is a story about a farmer and a snake.

In the cold winter, the old man on his way home saw a frozen snake on the side of the road.

So the old man felt compassionate, and took the snake home in his arms.

During the journey, the temperature of the old man quickly saved the snake.

After the snake woke up, it immediately bit the old man.

When the old man was dying, he said regretfully: "I actually saved a poisonous snake, this is my retribution."

This story tells a simple and straightforward truth:

No matter how kind you are, and no matter how willing to help others, you must recognize the people you have helped.

Help the same kind and sincere people, and your kindness will be passed on;

But to help a person who is vicious and ungrateful by nature, not only will your kindness be swallowed up, but you will also be hurt.

In life, such ungrateful people can be seen everywhere.

When they encounter difficulties, they think of you at the first time; when they ask you, they are humble, flattering, and say all good things in front of you.

After using your value, you will be forgotten by them and not remembered.

When you encounter difficulties in the future, you want to ask them for help, but you find that the group of people you helped have long been hiding.

This is human nature.

People who are ungrateful and selfish must stay away from them.

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People who stay away from the "emotional black hole"

What is an "emotional black hole"?

To put it simply, a person's mood is very unstable and he is filled with negative emotions every day.

Moreover, his negative emotions are often passed on to those around him; the closer to him, the easier it is for him to swallow his positive emotions.

People with "emotional black holes" release negative energy every day.

If they don't have a good rest and their work is out of state, they blame the company;

He didn't grasp the time well, missed the appointment, and the other party left early, and he complained that the other party was unreasonable;

Obviously it was his own fault, but he tried to find all kinds of excuses to escape.

Such people not only have a lot of negative emotions, but are also good at avoiding problems.

Get along with them, and your good mood will disappear.

From a psychological point of view, people's ability to carry emotions is like a scaled container.

You put stones in it, you can also put sand in it, and finally you pour in water, and the container is full.

In the emotional container, there are your own positive emotions and your negative emotions, and the two ebb and flow or are in a state of balance.

Once someone breaks this balance and keeps pouring out negative emotions to you, can you bear it?

Most people actually like to see positive energy and positive things, because people's subconscious tends to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages.

When you encounter something that you are uncomfortable or don't like, you will often subconsciously stay away.

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Stay away from "people who don't love you"

"I originally set my heart to the bright moon, but the bright moon shines on the ditch."

In an intimate relationship, it's such a feeling that you can't love it.

You have exhausted all your strength, and you have given your material, emotions, love, and patience to the greatest extent, but you find that you still haven't moved the other party.

The person you like, still doesn't like you;

Even if you pay a lot, his feelings for you have not loosened in the slightest.

That feeling is like:

All your strength is on the cotton, there is no support point.

One of the things one cannot force: love.

Love is love, and you can't pretend without love.

If you happen to fall in love with someone, and the other person doesn't love you, trying is enough.

Even if you fail, as long as you let go in time, you won't leave too many regrets.

If you get deeper and deeper, the other party will feel pressure and stay away from you completely; for yourself, you will lose more.

Why bother?

For the rest of your life, learn to love yourself first and follow your own feelings first.

Today's topic:

Who do you feel uncomfortable with?

(The source network of the article with pictures)